May Blog | The 12 Stage of Healing – Stage 5 | Dr. Codi Osborne, Innately Yours Chiropractic Studio

Stage Five is one of the most misunderstood and most powerful phases in the healing journey. It’s the moment when we stop trying to escape the discomfort… and instead, fully merge with it.

Dr. Donald Epstein calls this Merging with the Illusion. It’s not about giving up, it’s about giving in. We surrender, not to defeat, but to the reality that we are not separate from our experiences, our emotions, or our bodies.

We stop fighting. And in that moment, something opens.

🫶 What Is the “Illusion”?

The “illusion” is the belief that we are broken, unworthy, or separate from healing. In Stage Five, we come face to face with that belief and instead of resisting it, we merge with it. We allow ourselves to feel what we’ve spent so long avoiding.

This stage isn’t always comfortable. But it is deeply transformative.

💬 My Experience With Stage Five

I’ve had moments, especially during emotional seasons of my life where I felt like I was sinking into the discomfort instead of rising above it. At first, it felt like I was failing or backsliding.

But with time and care, I realized: I was finally being with what I had run from. I wasn’t detached, dissociated, or distracting myself.  I was present, honest, and surrendered. That’s Stage Five.

And on the other side? A deeper peace than I had known before.

🧠 What’s Happening in the Nervous System

Stage Five shows up as a softening of resistance in the body. It’s the nervous system saying: “Okay, I’m ready to be with this now.” You may feel:

• A “melting” sensation in certain areas of your spine or body
• Gentle emotional waves (grief, sadness, even joy)
• Fatigue or stillness as your system slows down to integrate

In NetworkSpinal, we often see a drop in muscular tension, a quieting of the mind, and a clearer breath pattern. The body is no longer fighting, it’s feeling.

🛠️ Practices for Stage Five

Stage Five isn’t about solving, it’s about surrendering. Try these:

• Body Presence Practice: Sit or lay down and say aloud: “I allow myself to feel this fully.”
• Journaling Prompt: “If I stopped trying to fix this, what might I feel instead?”
• Supportive Touch: Use a warm compress, weighted blanket, or even a gentle hug to anchor safety as you feel.

You are not your pain. But your pain has something to say. Merging with it allows the message to come through.

🤍 Let’s Connect

If you’ve felt more emotional lately, or more deeply connected to feelings you’ve pushed aside, you may be in Stage Five. It’s a brave and sacred place to be.

Ask us how this stage might relate to your care journey. Your surrender is not weakness, it’s the beginning of profound healing.

With softness and strength,
Dr. Codi